It's a hard 'nuff life

hoo boy.

I find out yesterday I don't work today. I'm only working one day next weekend. My sister doesn't believe me when I tell her I'm poor. I went so far as to show her my bank statement. And she encouraged me to get the calculator. There. You see? And I can't get any groceries/goodies lest I sacrafice a bill.
I didn't call Noelle like I intended to, so I feel guilty there, too. This week has just been a mess. I've had a hard time focusing on anything. But I'm ready now. I made a promise to Jim that I'd get published. So I'm going to write this morning.
You know what I noticed?
When I talk about money being tight, mum tells me to go work at Lands' End or get a waitress job or something. When I talk about money being tight around Jim, he tells me:
"Get pounding on them keys, woman!" Which, the more I think about it, the more I realize what my problem is. Somehow, I got it in my head that writing's a hobby. It's nice if you got the time. But I wanted it to be a career. And it can't be if I keep putting it aside. What am I waiting for? Writing IS my 2nd job. I just haven't pulled a paycheck on it yet. And you can't do that until you finish a story and have the tits to put it in the mail. Yup.

I've been rice & beans poor before. I can do it again. It sucks-- But I can do it. It'll be educational. A lesson in humility and appreciation for things around me.